The World According to Nick
My take on Software, Technology, Politics, and anything else I feel like talking about.
Monday, March 20, 2006

All Hail The Dark Lord Xenu 

So as you've probably heard by now, Isaac Hayes (the voice of Chef) has decided to leave South Park, because he got sick of how they made fun of religion... or so he claimed. Matt Stone then responded by saying:

This has nothing to do with intolerance and bigotry and everything to do with the fact that Isaac Hayes is a Scientologist and that we recently featured Scientology in an episode of 'South Park.' In ten years and over 150 episodes of 'South Park,' Isaac never had a problem with the show making fun of Christians, Muslims, Mormons and Jews. He got a sudden case of religious sensitivity when it was his religion featured on the show. To bring the civil rights struggle into this is just a non-sequiter. Of course we will release Isaac from his contract and we wish him well.

Comedy Central was going to re-air the show this last week, but decided not to at the last moment, and replaced it with two episodes featuring Chef that were to act as a tribute to him. Some are wondering whether it was because of pressure from Tom Cruise (also a Scientologist):

Actor Tom Cruise threatened to boycott promotion of his upcoming Paramount Pictures film unless a sister cable TV network pulled a South Park rerun lampooning the Church of Scientology, industry sources said today.

Representatives for Paramount and Cruise, a prominent Scientologist, denied he made any such threats or had anything to do with the Comedy Central network cancelling plans to air a repeat of the South Park episode titled Trapped in the Closet on Wednesday.

To which Stone and Park responded with:

So, Scientology, you may have won THIS battle, but the million-year war for earth has just begun! Temporarily anozinizing our episode will NOT stop us from keeping Thetans forever trapped in your pitiful man-bodies. Curses and drat! You have obstructed us for now, but your feeble bid to save humanity will fail! Hail Xenu!!!

If you want to decide for yourself, you can watch the episode in question on You Tube.

Probably the funniest part about that South Park episode is that during the show when they're talking about what Scientologists believe, they put the words "This is What Scientologists Actually Believe" on the screen... and they weren't lying. As it turns out, my Dad had a brief stint with Scientology in the 80's, which I was thankfully shielded from. If you've never read about Scientology at all, and have no idea what they actually believe, then this Wikipedia article is a good starting place. Also of interest is this article on Xenu, which you get to find out about if you pay enough money. Among other things, they believe that alien bodies were blown up by atom bombs inside volcanoes. Then their souls were captured by evil aliens and put inside movie theaters where they were brainwashed, and now inhabit all of us. Seriously!

Maybe that's why so many actors and actresses seem to fall for Scientology. Hmmm... I wonder if that's why so many are really liberal and practice in moonbattery on the side.


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Name: Nick
Home: Wauwatosa, WI, United States

I'm a Software Consultant in the Milwaukee area. Among various geeky pursuits, I'm also an amateur triathlete, and enjoy rock climbing. I also like to think I'm a political pundit.

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