Rewriting Classic Sayings 

Part of an ongoing conceptual series examining classic phrases, and how they have to change in today's society.

For some reason today, the phrase "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade" came to mind. I'm not sure exactly what the etymology behind this phrase is, but it certainly comes from a time when life was a lot simpler, and there were far fewer laws and regulations that touched every aspect of our lives. So how does this phrase need to change given today's harsher political and economic climate?

"When life gives you lemons, fill out form 1035-L and attach it to your 1040-A to properly account for your added lemon income, then fill out form 1356-L to certify that any out of state lemons were properly inspected, then make lemonade, after filling out proper W-4's for any people who might help you squeeze those lemons, and having your facility properly inspected by OSHA to make sure that your lemon squeezing facilities are safe."

Of course... don't even get me started with the paperwork you need to fill out if you dare sell your lemonade somewhere.